A Confession of January 1, 2023

By Cliff Lake

A Confession of January 1, 2023

 

I cannot look at your eyes

Without seeing.

In them the stains of tears kept back

Markers of hurts

You didn’t try to avoid.

I cannot tell you things

Without hearing.

Untold tales that say too much

About everything

Or nothing at all.

I cannot walk with you

Without staying.

Too close to the places you will not visit

Have never seen

Or will not return to.

I cannot look for you

Without finding.

You are hidden from all outside you

While you walk in daylight

And are not seen.

I cannot listen to you

Without telling.

The things you will not know

And have not asked

And must never learn.

I cannot be beside you

Without leaving.

The pieces of myself ungathered

Unkempt and unkept

And looking for somewhere to be.

I cannot say anything to you

Without meaning.

To get at the bigger picture

That we are in

And are eating.

I cannot stop seeing

Without wishing for blindness.

To a nightmare I cannot escape

Until I am allowed to lay down

To my final rest.

And so it goes…

 

Cliff Lake 1/1/2023

Copyright © Clifford Lake 2023

Location: Dalton, MA, USA

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