Advisements for the Guiltless

By Cliff Lake

 

Advisements for the Guiltless

 

Hey there, Grumpy Gus,

Got your best same suit on?

Got your frown on your face?

Well then, you’re ready…

 

Make a statement on the courthouse steps,

Be sure to sneer

When mispronouncing the judges’ name.

Defame the jury anonymously,

That way the charges can’t stick.

Do you have any pictures

Of the prosecutors relatives?

Hand those out freely

As proof of your goodwill.

Make certain to deride the proceedings,

No more viable demonstration of virtue

Is there than insult,

Everyone knows that.

Your fervid proclamations of innocence,

Will surely be bolstered,

By threats and intimidation,

So, you must bluster angrily,

And scowl fiercely.

And let us not forget the efficacy

Of endless complaint,

Grousing, grumbling, and griping,

Are most welcome in the courts,

Making you appear strong, invincible.

Remember, it’s the dog that whines,

That gets fed best.

So, whine like a dog, dawg.

Finally, one must assemble a gang.

Nothing promotes your cause,

Like a horde,

Foaming and fomenting,

And misspelling.

Don’t forget to social mediocre,

Every night for hours on end,

The courts want to know

How much you enjoyed your time,

And how much

You look forward to returning tomorrow.

If you need more counsel,

May I suggest rehiring Alina?

 

That’s all I have for you this time around,

But I’ll be there for you,

As much as I am right now.

 

Cliff Lake 4/12/2024

Copyright © Clifford Lake 2024

Location: Manhattan, New York, NY, USA

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