Eats

Eats

In Coffeyville, Kansas, on 169,

Is a dirty little place that invites you to dine,

On burnt toast and eggs that are runny,

And pieces of meat that may once have been bunny.

Now there’s only one waitress, she’s got a drippy nose,

That she’s constantly wiping on the front of her clothes.

The attitude she has may just lead you to murder,

If she ever bothers to take your order.

And she’s not very bright, but at least she’s real slow,

But she’s always really quick to tell you where to go.

And she doesn’t have a pencil, and she doesn’t have a straw,

And she doesn’t have a clue, and she doesn’t have a bra.

So, the food is always cold, but the coffee’s even colder,

And if you ever get out, you’ll only be a little older.

And the prices are high, but so is the cook,

Who makes everything they serve look like some toxic gook.

So, if you’re ever in Coffeyville, (on 169),

I’ve got a little tip that may save you a dime:

Get in there and eat, and get out of there fast,

I know your car will start; you’ll have plenty of gas.

Cliff Lake 8/17/1994

CliffSongs